Cow and possum
Are you looking for a skit for your Christmas concert? You may use this one of mine if you like and if you acknowledge me as the author. Hannah and I originally did it with a cow puppet and a possum puppet – hence the name – but you could do it with different puppets or as actual people.
Note that Possum is excitable and increasingly annoyed and Cow is placid and ponderous throughout.
POSSUM: Would you like to play Twenty Questions?
COW: Yes, that would be good.
POSSUM: Do you want to choose a person?
POSSUM: Have you got one?
POSSUM: Okey-dokey: is it a female?
POSSUM: Is she alive?
POSSUM: So, that’s two questions so far?
COW: No: six.
POSSUM: Six! It couldn’t possibly be six! There’s no way…. hold on: did you count it when I asked if you if it was two questions so far?
POSSUM: And when I asked if you’d chosen a person? And when I asked you if you wanted to play Twenty Questions?
COW: Yes. And yes.
POSSUM: That is not the way you play Twenty Questions! Do you really think this is normal?
COW: Yes: it’s the way I play Twenty Questions.
POSSUM: That’s ridiculous! That’s stupid! That’s [SUDDENLY RESIGNED]…. all right, we’ll play it your way. So we’re up to six questions?
COW: It’s eleven now.
POSSUM: Oh, this is not fair at all! You don’t really think this is fair, do you?
COW: Perfectly fair.
POSSUM: Well how about you count out loud as we go from now on, so that I know where we’re up to? Can you fit that into your stupid rules?
COW: Yes, I can: fourteen.
POSSUM: Fourteen and I’ve hardly started! I have no hope! …Have I already asked if she’s alive?
COW: Yes. Fifteen.
POSSUM: That doesn’t count! It’s just a confirmation of the second question! What makes you think you can count that?
COW: Because it’s a question. Sixteen.
POSSUM: So, was she alive?
COW: Yes. Seventeen.
POSSUM: Okay, so she’s an alive female?
COW: Yes. Eighteen.
POSSUM: No! That was introspection: I wasn’t asking you!
COW: You get twenty questions regardless of who you ask.
POSSUM: Eighteen! I’ve only got two questions left?
COW: Yes. Except that was nineteen so you’ve only got one left now.
POSSUM: The queen?
COW: Yes, that’s right. Well done.
 Shy performers can sometimes be persuaded to do puppet shows so do bear that in mind if some of your gang are retiring types.