What’s the difference between
Review your cracker jokes and cull the weakest ones and then type them out and print them. Cut them into snippets, fold them and put them away… making a note of where you put them in your Christmas book.
“If we went skiing for a week, could you come?” asked Don. “Or could you only do a weekend?”
That’s a tricky one: I’d be happy to have a good, long skiing holiday but I’d hate spending five days of my annual leave sitting in a ski lodge in the rain looking out at the mud.
“The school holidays are 25 June to 10 July,” he replied.
I like teachers, I think they’re a vital part of the community and I’m glad my sister and her husband are in the profession but they’re very annoying to travel with because it’s always peak season.
Q: What do you call a person who’s afraid of Father Christmas?
 To be very green, use secondhand paper.
 I use a small font to keep the snippets small but, if you’ve got plenty of space, you can use a large font that grandparents can read without glasses (although this was wasted on my friend Jenny’s father-in-law who used to pretend to read a cracker joke while actually substituting one of his own and his sense of humour was – shall we say – nautical, and not suitable for polite company).