2 April

Twice as nice in a slice

Fruit mince is close to immortal: if you still have half a jar at the back of your fridge, there’s a good chance it will last until next December… but half a jar won’t be enough then so you might as well use up those last scraps now.

Here’s a recipe for fruit mince slice (and if you don’t have a full cup of fruit mince, just add extra apple).[1]

Fruit Mince Slice

 02 apr 2016.jpg

START : 2 hours before

185g butter                              1 egg                                        1 jar fruit mince

2 cups plain flour                     1 apple


Set oven to 190°C. Line a 28cm x 18cm lamington tin with baking paper.

Rub butter into flour. Add egg and mix until mixture comes together. Toss onto a lightly floured surface and knead until smooth.

Press half of the dough into the tin. Bake for 10 minutes. Cool. Roll out remaining pastry and refrigerate for 15 minutes.

Grate apple, mix with fruit mince and put on top of baked pastry. Cut rolled pastry into strips and arrange on top in a diagonal lattice. Bake for 30 minutes or until golden and then cool and slice.


Hannah came round last night. First she asked me how everything was going,[2] then she made me a cup of tea (in my favourite cup), put some mince slice on a pretty plate and told me to sit down.

“I’ve got some bad news for you,” she said, “And it will upset you but you need to remember that it’s not a tragedy and everything will be fine.”

(Cancer? No, that is a tragedy. She’s lost her job? No, she’ll get another.)

“I’m having Christmas in Hawthorn this year.”

“With your father!”

“No, with Pixie and Poppet. Well, yes, he’ll be there but that’s not why I’m going: I worked out that he was a dickhead before I finished primary school.”

“Hawthorn!” I said, still aghast.

“Pixie kept asking me why I wasn’t going to be with her at Christmas when I’m her sister and she loves me and I thought that she was right and I’ll never have another chance to have Christmas with them when they’re this little. So my plan is that I’ll stay there Christmas Eve and be there Christmas morning and have Christmas dinner with them, and arrive here about five for Christmas tea.”

Well, that’s something: at least she’ll be here for tea.

[1] My mother once followed a recipe for orange-frosted almond nutmeg cake but substituted hazelnuts for the almonds, cinnamon for the nutmeg and lemons for oranges. It tasted great but I don’t think she should have continued to call it orange-frosted almond nutmeg cake.

[2] Tickety-boo.

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